and i'm leading it my way.

Saturday, July 31, 2004

Haiz I'm sad.. But i dun dare to tell anyone... In my opinion, i think that it is better to let go a relationship if the person has no feelings for you.... " sOu wEi, tIaN yA hE cHu wU fAnG cHaO... hE pI dAn lIaN yI zHi hUa "... If the gal dun like u anymore, wat for u cling onto her? Have u ever think wat will the gal thinks? sObx~~ I wanna SHOUT this to 1 of my korkor... "KOR" STAND UP bah!!!! There are more gal out there... Who knows, you might find ur real princess one day? Once he had told me, "MEI" dun give up of yourself because of 1 guy.. You are not on the wrong, is he himself dun know how to treasure u... But now he himself become like that.. I wan him to know, we are so worry & sad for u.. I can understand how u feel nw, but at else give yourself some time can.. No matter how open we talk or meet, our heart is always together.. My this korkor dote me so much, i dun wanna see him sad.. But meimei dun know how to make u happy.. I am so stupid!!! wish that korkor will read this blog writen by ping meimei today

♥ 2:52 PM

Friday, July 30, 2004

Juz came back from work ya.. And heard something.. Soo soo astonishing!! My little brother, who is in sec4 now had a stead!! *Omgz* But now break lers.. *Omgz* He this guy even used the wrapper of sweets to fold into a ring for her as memories.. *Omgz* so *Touching* sia.. Lame!! L0ls.. Well well.. Now every child is growing mature so fast sia.. Anyway, i just visit a webbie @ http://www.astprince.com/english/sushi/indexe.html
It was a fortune teller webbie.. & the prediction are all so true man!! Realli describe mi sia...

LOVE = Salmon : high self-esteem, never take the active role even you like someone

MONEY = Yellow Tail : like things that are different from others

CAREER = Maguro : strong personality, persistent, treasure your family and colleagues

FAMILY = Tamago : long for motherliness and warmth of family

WISH = Crab Egg Salad : want to live in a foreign country, but you need to learn some language first

-- sighs -- Was feeling so bad now.. It was like.. Everybody is toking abt future, career & money etc.. While mi, i'm not worried at all.. It was like.. WTF??? Why am i not behaving like a adult? I wanna study!! Not work.. -- s0b -- Hate this life sia.. Well, daddy sat before " u cant have the best of whole world ".. So confused now.. Just now, quarrelled wid hubby till his sound was so upsad & angry.. -.- He now more n more ' da nan ren '.. Sooner or later.. i will give him a punch bahs.. Forget abt it lahx.. It's all my fault... So from now on i better change my temper lor... S0bx.. Bi already treat me very gd already, i say i wan NDP tickets he look look here look look there, ask ask here and ask ask there.. Finally got 2, so i better dun make anymore last min request le.. I know he also in a very differuilt postion... I think i should learn how to " zhi zhu " ba...

♥ 8:11 PM

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

i'm down with a serious sores throat & cough... but still went to work.. didn't recover abit at all.. was so uncomfortable the whole day @ work.. mummy came over to accompany me for lunch, so sweet of her... today kinda boring @ work.. took that little bit of time to going through my magazine.. other then that was day dreaming & scribbling rubbish on papers.. msn-ing with xiao zhu, korkor, xiao min & linda... just finished talking to jacob & bernard berfore that.. i'm feeling so terrible.. counting down... 1 month.. & i will be entering the realm of mists.. & my soul will be gone in the mist.. my shadow will be stolen.. i dun know when i can see the sun again.. but i'm sure that i will... i'm so so so sad.. there are so many thins i have yet to do.. so worry for my bibi, family member & friends.. they need my care & concern... i think i am down with a serious headach now.. & i can't write and think anymore....

♥ 6:25 PM

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Today was kinda OK~~ Feeling kinda tired though.. Was falling asleep half way through in meeting.... Haiz, was supposed to go to the doctor but my mum totally forget about it.. But it was a blessing in disguise.. [ hAs ThE fLaMe dIeD?? ] ( oR m I jUsT bEiNg oVeR-sEnsItIvE ) [ dO yOu mIsS mE mOrE nOw? ] ( oR hAvE yOu ReAliSeD tAt yOu cAn LiVe wItHoUt mE ) So sad today.... I understand everythings happens for a reason... But then when i think back... Angry with you really pointless... This incident just make me feel weird~~ Do we all take everythings for granted? I wasn't sad when i heard the bed news & quarrel with actually... Until i had a private moment alone & my eye when pass ours photo... Then i slowly recalled everythings that happen to both of us...... Dun say anymore le, tear going to drop.. So " FAN REN " this few days.. Dun know what happen to myself....

♥ 6:57 PM

Monday, July 26, 2004

Mmm wasn't feeling that great today.. Quarrel over some stuff that made me angry yet sad @ the same time... Hmmm, maybe U might be reading this now, but what I wanna say is, u might have your ways & I have mine.. Sometime ppl have to be fexible & do some reflection ya!! U sounded out that I am [xiao qi].. Okie, I'm fine.. I agree with it.. I did my own reflection already,,, About being rude 2 u, I had my own reason.. I definitely know I'm "xiao qi" @ time.. Is very normal for a gal to behave like this what... Jus hoping that we can spend more time together before everything has end... I'm scare that one fine day I might not be able to talk to you, care for you or even do a small things for u... Sometime I really wish I could control my temper but I simply dun know why I dun control it... I know you have gave in a lot to this relationship already... I'm sorry, hope to seek for your forgiveness here... This 5 months, you really gave me alots of sweets & warm moment with u.. But there is still some unhappy things happen between us.. Really sorry~~ I knew that I had hurt u many times le.. & I know u have try your very best to understand my feeling le.. I believe our relationship is strong enough... Nothings can beats us down de... Hope all those unhappy things will end soon......

♥ 10:19 PM

Sunday, July 25, 2004

This morning wake up around 11am.. Saw { Bernard } msg asking how I feel.. Has my headache gone??? SO warm & sweet of this korkor... Then I miss daddy & mummy so I try to call home but they r sick & has fallen asleep.. Feeling very listless today!! Or rather this few days ba.. My health has deteriorate.. As if I am going to faint anytime.. Has been eating as per normal lehx.. Somemore ate coffee ice-cream jus now sia.. yUmMiE yUmMiE But sad to say, my hubby is down with serious fly & cough.. So me help out with some house work.. I think one punch aim @ him, he's gone.. HeeHeee~~ Then I tiny up our room & iron some of the cloths.. Time really flies.. Around 3+, bibi's mum woke up from her afternoon nap and asked me if I wan noddle or rice for our lunch??? I answered anything lor.. Hmmm, she cook [E-MEE] for us.. After finishing the ironing, then i faster go bath.. Coz i can smell those funny smell coming out from my body.. EeEeEee~~ Bo bian leh, too hardworking already.. Wake bi up for the late lunch and stay @ the living room watch "zHeN qInG".. Well, after the show have end, we proceed to Hougang Mall & buy some files for our photo.. When we reaches home not long, bi's parents brought some food for us.. We gona be a fast eater coz time is getting late.. & tomorrow still got work.. After my dinner, I faster bath & when reaches room, I saw bi laying straight on the bed.. I think he still have not recover from his sickness.. When I touch on his body, it's so HOT.. Can cook a hard boil egg sia... So I took a tower & pour with some cold water & help him clean his body.. Hoping that his fever will goes off... See bibi like that I really feel so -_- kAn ChIoNg & hEaRt PaIn -_- OMG~~His body is so HOT leh... HOW AR??? I keep on clean here & there... In the end, clean until I fall asleep....

♥ 1:47 PM

Saturday, July 24, 2004

HuRhUr Woke up this morning@ 9am bahs.. Dame shaggy sia~ The first things that came to my mind was - " bibi going for NDP " SIAN AR.. Gonna stay @ home alone again.. LOL... Teah, wake up then go wash up.. My bao bei bibi then faster ride to 805 and buy duck porridge for me.. wOw, so nice.. Hmmm, after our morning breakfast immediately bibi received a phone call from her aunt saying his aH gOnG only left 1-2 days... @ this moment, I can see bibi face is full with worries.. & soon he decided to call his boss & tell him he not going for the NDP lor.. [ HIP HIP HU RAY ]~~ Ha-ha, so happy.. No need to be alone lor.. But then the feeling of me now is tired & bi ask me to have a short nap first b4 going to the hospital.. Around 3+, I woke up.. We faster change and set off.. Haiz, bibi's aH gOnG really so ke lian lah.. Dun know how to say lor.. But really feel so heart pain when I saw him laying down there.. Anyway, we stay till 8+ & bi's dad ask we all to go home first.. So we headed home.. Daily routing, bath & ect.... Then talk to bibi parent for awhile & kOoN lE...

♥ 11:34 PM

Friday, July 23, 2004

i am soOoOoo tired & finally reaches home!! Ha-ha, took half day leave & was out to town (Bugis) today.. Hmm, didn't buy anything.. Wanted to buy one top but not sure if it fit my jeans anot, so maybe I shall try it out next time lor.. Went to meet Ke, Er & Peili today.. Passed them the photo we took o Ke's birthday.. Haiz, my hair looks so funny~~ Didn't really comb it jus now.. Guess, it's time for me to go toilet and comb my hair le... Had a hard time tying it.. Stupid hair... =) Only managed to grab some bread during the lunch time... WEI~~ Stupid stomach keep on calling me... But I am not going to have my dinner, coz I'm going to wait for bibi... He promise to join me for dinner 1... 5pm~ 6pm~ 7pm~ ( Beeps - HP Message ) Received a message from bibi asking me to settle my dinner & go home myself.. @ that time, I am feeling so disappointed & unhappy.. But think back, bo bian leh.. Coz bibi need to work meh.. Correct??? So I took MRT to " kovan " & have a plate of chicken rice over there.. It's so nice!! After my dinner, I went straight to bibi's house.. Talk to bibi's mummy for awhile then bath.. Now waiting for bibi returned.. Coz I got a lot of staff to chat with him... Wahahaha~~ Okay, shall stop my nonsense here......

♥ 9:21 PM

Thursday, July 22, 2004

Damned~~~ Diarrhoea!!!! I hate it.... "SHIT" till my ass nearly split into 2! Opps.... Did i forget something? Everybody ass are made up of 2 piece.... One on the left and the other on the right... *tada* right! Alright.. I know i am getting kinda lame here. =P Gotta rush on my MCT learning journals.... Due to the meetingt tomorrow??? Ciaoz!!! Tired....

♥ 5:29 PM

Monday, July 19, 2004

Today go Sengkang & Punggol see show flat... Wow, so many "meimei" de houses.. But compare to last time 5 room is so much smaller.. Me & bibi went to all the show flat 1st, then we immediately went to the HDB to get the price list.. WOW~~ so "X".. Wan me life ar? Haiz, then bibi suggest go CPF board to get his statement. Hey, tell u all a sercert, bibi got 30k+ in his cpf leh.. So what? He ya ya papaya like tat.. I then dun care about him.. "Na Na Na" We have MOS bugger for our lunch & walk walk over @ Junction 8.. Hmmm, i brought one "xiang yen he" for bibi... Starting ak him wan anot, he still answer, "dun wan lah, so X".. But after all my temp, he decided to buy... Time fly so fast, 6 o'clock lor.. We faster went home.. After dinner, bibi's daddy give us some advise on the flat and soon both of us, KNOCK OFF~~~

♥ 10:04 PM

Sunday, July 18, 2004

Lalala~~ Going to farm & kanji nature reserve liao lo.. My first time to all this places.. nEhNeH... Can take a lot of nice nice pic lo... Early morning, woke up, bibi suggest me to this 2 places.. So exciting~ But my bao bei bibi, wake up only keep on " ah choo ah choo ".. & he insist to have " da mee " for breakfast.. What is this? HaIz, bo bian so we went 2 had our breakfast @ the " da mee " market, but the " da mee " Q veri long & this lazy bibi dun wan to wait... Siao one leh, then we had " e mee & ban mian " EeEeeEe, not nice de... After our breakfast, the 1st place we headed to kanji nature reserve.. So windy so over there & we started our walk-- In the main while, we also took a lot of pic... Walk walk walk & i this talkative gal talk & talk... Out of a sudden, a monitor lizard crawl beside bibi without me notice it.. Bibi scream, and i got scare by him.. SHIT LEH!!! I though what happen, KNN my whole person jump up & leg began to soft.. Next we proceed to the farm @ lim chu kang.. Wow, there are a lot of interesting things there, example " bees " " goats" " turkeys " " marine fishes " & alot more... In the middle of our walk, we pass this pet shop, there is this doggie keep on barking @ bibi... [ i think bibi and this doggie quarrel b4 ] HeehEe, i brought three bottle of honey & got 1 free... Soon, we went to see bibi's ah gong... Hmmm, he still inside hospital leh, [ ke lian ].. He look so sick, when the moment i saw him, i feel so heart pain.. Even though he is not my ah gong, but i see the pain he going thought i really pity him a lot.. Haiz, after leaving the hospital, we went for our lunch & straight... Coz my whole body very sticky... Rest for awhile, [ chit-chat ] for awhile, bibi's mum call & ask us go 805 for dinner... We had " mix veg rice " for our dinner, very full leh... When reaches hm, is about 9 lor.. Bibi decided to called his fatty boss & took leave tomorrow & this stupid ass agree... Like tat i also take off lor~~ Wahaha, time to go to bed after a tired day of walk lo~~

♥ 10:59 PM

Saturday, July 17, 2004

RiNg RiNg~ bibi called & ask if i wan mac for my breakfast & i agree with it.. Soon my breakfast reach lor.. Like ordering delivery... hMm, so nice... After finishing our breakfast, bibi take a nap & ask me to wake him up at 12.45pm.. then soon he went for his ndp lor... I stay @ bibi house & help bibi clean up his room... MoP mOp MoP, cLeAn ClEaN cLeAn.. Noon, i had pizza with dewei... Then i took a short nap, ZzzzzZzzZz.... Wake up about 6+, then bath... Feeling so excited, coz bibi wanted to bring me go eat " DA CHAG ".... About 9+, dewei run into my room & say " hEy, mY bRo cAmE bAcK aLrEaDy lEh ", i faster run out and hide inside the store room.. hEeHeE, nAnAnA PoOpOO..... he can't find me.... After that, we faster change and headed to East Coast Park for our dinner... Hmmm, got " fIsH & bIg HeAd ".... So full, reaches home is about 11+, same thing lor, bath already then lay on our cozy bath & zZZzzz again...

♥ 11:53 PM

Friday, July 16, 2004

VeRy tIrEd ar!!! Past few days time jus pass by without even blinking my eye... Amazing how time flies when u don't think abt it.. Pretty scary wor.. Been busy with work.. Lucky wkend coming~~ Okiez, same thing BI ride me to office then i ate the bread BI brought.. Start my work for the day.. WOW!! First thing open outlook, 46 new msg.. Only one day MC lah.. Shit lah, so many thing to complete.. Bo BiAn lor, so quickly do lor.. Busy with invoices, shipment, smartbuy and ect... Even bi call me i also not free talk to him.. " sOrRy bIbI, i not like u so lucky slack here and there ".... Heehee!! Busy doing this, busy doing tat, soon reaches 5.. Heehee, going to knock off lor... Then i received a phone call from bibi saying he will be late, so i guai guai wait for him @ my office.. When bibi reaches, his whole face was black like [BAO QING TIAN].. How i crack joke he also dun laugh.. Then he start to scold " they are a burch of idiot, ass hole & ect... " Who make me bi angry? See lah, " HAI wo de " ear also knna.. Haiz, actually we plan to go see bi ah gong de, but when i ask him, u know what he reply " DUN WAN TO GO LAH, SO LATE ALREADY, REACH HM WHAT TIME ".. This kind of ppl also got, not only tat.. Along our way hm, he like shooting MTV sia, ride until so fast.. U think my life cheap ar? I nearly fall once lah, when the green light started i still dun know, happily view ppl car when he pump his oil my whole body like falling behind.. [ u wan me SI JIO CHA TIAN ar ] When reaches ECP, his guy scold ppl again, he said " SHIT LAH, now what time still so many car... " @ this moment, i was thinking.. Now is 6+ only, u need to go hm ppl no need mah? Anyway i never say anything, coz i dun wan to walk hm from ECP... Heehee~~ Soon we reaches hm, as usual bath & have our dinner.. Force bi to write his blog.. Talk to this naughty guy awhile and let me " FA XIE " then a while later bibi pat me to slp lor~~~~

♥ 10:55 PM

Thursday, July 15, 2004

Whoo la la~! today on MC!! No need to work.. Whoo!!! Early morning, wake up @ about 10.30AM.. Then go brush teeth, i slowly slowly brush, coz i scare i knna the places where i puked out my teeth yesterday.. Hmmm, took about 25 min to complete my wash up.. Tat long.. haAha.. Den i return back room... Rest, surprising.. Bibi called & ask, " gal u wanna have some duck porriage for your lunch " no choice, i agree with it.. Coz there's nothing i can eat.. Ring ring~~ call again? Who can it be this time, oh is a message.. " Mummy " msg me, say she very angry, without second though, i returned her call.. Tat ass again, she made my mummy angry.. Dun understand, why the manager would wan to employee her.. She dun look pretty nor she look cute!! Haiz, anyway dun say about her, or else spoilt my mood.. Soon, my bao bei return hm wif my lunch.. After having our lunch, we this two lazy pig went for a afternoon nap... [before i fall asleep, i chat wif bibi for awhile... I was so touch, bibi know i was sick & he faster took leave came hm & accompany me, so sweet of him] ZzzzzZzz~~~ Wake up about 5+ like tat, bibi went to hougang mall buy some makan makan thing back... So " kan chiong " dun know what bibi going to buy for me.. " SELF-FISH " he brought himself a fish-hambaobao & brought me some TUTU kuey.. Somemore the filling inside is coconut, i dun like it.. ANGRY cum SAD~~ Lucky bibi share his fishbaobao wif me.. Heeheee, very nice!! Soon we had our dinner & after tat bibi iron his number 1, WOW... [ so smart when he wore his number 1 ] 9PM lor... Haha, it's time to lie on my cozy bed with bibi & watch TV & koon~~~~

♥ 10:10 PM

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

The bomb has finally ended, just went 2 puck out my big tooth.. So BRAVE!!!! [ nw become " BO KEI " ]
I'm simply too tired.. The stupid BIG BIG TOOTH was gone with the wind.. I must have not brush my teeth properly.. That's explains why its giving me problems..
First time went to dentist, feeling so " KAN CHIONG ". Dun know should I consider " HENG " or " SUAI ", the person queuing infornt of me call & cancel his/her appointment... Soon doctor came~~ Pulling myself into the OPERATION room, laying on the OPERATION chair.. Opening my mouth big wif strong light shining on it... Doctor then inject some medicine and make half of my mouth numb.. The doctor laugh @ me, asking me first time ar, then we contious our conversation.. SURPISE~~ without any notice, he pull out my tooth.. WOW!! Tat fast... Without any pain, but I can feel half side of my lip like become - XIANG CHANG...
When reaches hm, I'm feeling terrible, laying on the bed and soon I fall asleep... The very last thing I remember was bibi woke me up & ask me to take out the cotton inside my mouth.. That all!! [Koon Le]

♥ 11:04 PM

Monday, July 12, 2004

Haiz~~ Wake up only, dun know what kind of feeling I have today??? My heart feels so heavy... My entire physical body felt so tired.. Felt as if all my bones are gonna collapsed... & that's the end of me.. Leaving behind only a pack of crushed broken bones... Yupz!!!

Been thinking a lot today since the morning I woke up.. Sat on bibi's bed.. & kept stoning there... Then woke up & get ready to work.. But I was still stoning.. Felt a little frustration in me myself.. Why thinking of a lot of things, not positive things & was frustrated why I can't do things properly.. Why??? Why I jus can't make it the right way?? So much so much WHYs in my head & I jus could not found a way a way to explain... Nothing leads to it..

Thinking abt my parents, my future, my work, my health, my love life.. Haha.. So much so much... Unsure of a lot of things now, dunno what should I do... Tell me, what should I do? Can't differentiate a few things in me too.. Really feel like knowing wad is wad, but I am jus clueless... Simply clueless.. ARGH!!! Maybe I'm too stress out with me work...

♥ 11:49 PM

Sunday, July 11, 2004

Yeah, had a long day for sat.. & today! SobZ, it's the end of the week, & tmr is MONDAY!! DaRn-- I never liked Mondays!! ArGh~~~
So basically, woke up quit early in the morning.. Taken BEE HOON for breakfast cum lunch.. Preparing to go GaI gAi lor, but out of a sudden, it rain.. [rAiN rAiN gO aWaY, cOmE aGaIn ThE oThEr dAy~~~] Nvm, mi & bibi keep outself busy wif the computer while waiting for the rain to stop... Soon, the rain stop.. Then we quickly bath & faster change & dash out of the house.. Hmmm, we went to see "GONG GONG" @ NUH.. He is so pity, we feel so heart pain when we saw him [HAO KE LIAN].. Then we went to Orchard [made payment to VAMPIRE] & follow by Chinatown... BI was so IRRITATING!!! Keep on telling me he hungry, AH FAT... BO BIAN, so we had our dinner over @ MEI SHI JIE.. After tat, we go walk walk here and walk walk there, we brought a lot of things, got [towel, doudou, tops & a lot more] So heavy... At this time, decided to go hm first & place out things first then headed to Hougang Mall.. Reaches Hougang Mall, Bi brought a [chain spray, bulb & shirt (for dewei)] Seriously, by den both of us r so tired already.. So we faster went hm.. Bi took around 15min down the carpark servicing his bike.. We had our usual performances, bi chase me go PON PON, say I [LE DA GUI]... I was so tired after tat & I left into my dreamland w/o anyone know! Neh Neh Ni Bu Bu! *Childish*

** Oh, lEt mE sHaRe wIf u sOmEtHiNg bEfOrE i EnD tOdAy'S EntRy.. BUSINESS LAW **
<<>> =
IF A POLICE COME UP 2 U & ASK "WHAT U DOING", CANNOT SAY OR PRETEND 2 SAW "NOTHING".. HE/SHE HAS THE RIGHT THE RIGHT 2 BRING U BACK 2 THE STATION.. YA, MUST @ LEAST SAY SOMETHING, example " I'm TALKING 2 THE GOD"

♥ 10:18 PM

Thursday, July 08, 2004

u noe i'm lazy...
u noe i'm stubborn....
u noe i hated it when i'm being nagged at...
u noe i'll purposely do things da other way instead...

Everything's my fault~~~
My fault for lazing~~~
My fault for hurting u~~~
My fault for not being bothered about anything~~~
My fault for thinking tat everything will be fine~~~
My fault for not apologising~~~
My fault for ignoring...

u think i'm not remorseful???
u think i'm not bothered???
u think i feel great???
u think i find u irritating???

Mus u always be harsh on me until i break down???
Mus i always cry wheneva u did so???

Being hated more than being loved...
Thanx...
Den let me hate u...

i'm hurt too

♥ 4:14 PM

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Wah!! Amazing, nowaday reaches office early man, 7.30am... [Keke..] & started my day of work.. Today damn busy, but dunno why i suddenly can fell aslp.. Nodding my head.. [Haha..] Then my stupid mind is like "CANNOT SLP, CANNOT SLP!! Dunno why always so tired? Yesterday la! STUDY STUDY STUDY!!! [MA DE..] But also good la.. Then afternoon me & my collages went for lunch @ around 12.00pm.. [WAH SAY,] TERRIBLE LEH.. GUESS WHAT... When i came back, i saw " M--K " [one of my engineer].. U know what, he ask me help him redo all the work he asign to me the pass few days.. I think i'm his full time maid leh.. He still said, "Siew Peng, cannot do wrongly lor, this spreedsheet is very important to me.." IMPORTANT mah? Everytime do his things also IMPORTANT one.. SIAN... No choice lor, DO DO DO, CHECK CHECK CHECK.. "WO DE YAN JING" nearly drop out sia... Finally finish... -_- Chamz!.. & somemore today alot of the engineers on leave.. SHIOKS!.. [Keke..] Hope everyday also like that... Hmmmmm, someone else is coming down & fatch me, so i better faster rush down lor.. [or else later say i MO JIE again] Then i left work around 6pm... Today WeiLi going for her TP-TEST, nervous for her.. But sad to say, she never call me and tell me if she make it anot leh.. HAIZ, this kind of friend also got.. Think she forget about me le la.. =) When reaches hm, my eyes already closing half way le.. [YAWNS...] Whole body aching sia, eat also never eat, bath also never bath, just lay on my cosy bed & zZzzzZzzzz.... sWeEt dReAm..... [kOoNz lE~~~~~~] -_-

♥ 9:45 AM